Friends, How Many Of Us Have Them

I bet if you gave it some serious thought you could probably think of three to five individuals in your lifetime that you’ve called your best friend. More than likely you haven’t seen or talked to that friend in years. I spent 20 years in the U.S. Navy and I’ve traveled all over the world. During those years I’ve had the pleasure of calling many of those Sailors I've traveled with my best friend. Typically after a 3-4 year tour, you and that best friend would vow to stay in touch and visit each other often. And so life continues. You write, call, and now days email each other as often as possible. Then comes that day. That day when the writing stops, the phone no longer rings and the emailing goes away. Why is that? What happens?

When I retired from the Navy I left making that same promise to two fine gentlemen that I am still personal friends with today. Bruce “BUC” Henry and Robert “Chris” Newton. I don’t get the chance to see Bruce or Chris as often as I like, but we stay in touch and I have an awesome relationship with these guys to this day.

In 2002 Nicole and I decided that it was time for us to step out in faith, leave our current church and start worshiping at Covenant Church. That was the turning point in our life, our marriage and our friendship. That move brought Nicole and I closer together spiritually. But it also drew us closer together as friends. Since worshipping at Covenant Church we've formed some extraordinary relationships. We also met Ronald and Pia Fortune. It’s difficult in this world for a man to find another like minded man that he can confide in and call a best friend. It’s also a beautiful thing when your wife can have that same type of friendship with that man's wife.

These are just a few examples of how three friendships of mine survive and flourish today. I can talk about many more great friends that I have on the job, in the community, and through my Christian family. I've been tremendously blessed with great friends in my life. The bottom line is we need friends in our life. We are social beings. Whether a best friend or just someone you frequently communicate with, we need these friends and the relationship they bring.

So what is true friendship? Jesus gave us the definition of a true friend in John 15: 13-15. “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.”

There are plenty examples and scriptures in the bible that convey true friendship. Take the relationship between David and Saul's son Jonathan, who, in spite of his father Saul's pursuit of David and attempts to kill him, stood by his friend. 1 Samuel 18:3

- Can two walk together, except they be agreed?" Amos 3:3

- If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Ecclesiastes 4:10

- A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24

Of course there can be a downside to friendship. Friends can hurt you emotionally. They can lead you into sin. What about the advice they give? It is extremely important that we choose our friends wisely. The person you may consider to be a good friend could easily keep you from experiencing all the benefits that God has for you.

1Cor. 15:33, says to not be deceived. "Bad company corrupts good morals." God's word says - evil friends, ungodly friends will corrupt you. Perhaps, you have already experienced this. God has called us to walk godly and keep from sin. Being a friend comes with tremendous responsibility. Perhaps you're a friend that needs to repent because you've been a poor influence on a Christian brother or sister. Maybe you need to apologize and ask forgiveness for being an ungodly friend. It could be a bad attitude or participating in the gossip game. You have a responsibility for what you know from God's Word. So be a godly influence on all your friends.

- A godly friend is going to warn you when he sees you going astray.

- A godly friend will really love you enough to point out your sin.

- A godly friend will be concerned about your walk with God.

- A godly friend will encourage you to be godly!

- A godly friend will encourage you to be faithful to God.

Remember this, your goal as a Christian is to become more and more like Jesus Christ. So choose friends that will help you toward that Goal.